


Broken

by Kelkat9



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-30
Updated: 2013-05-30
Packaged: 2017-12-13 11:08:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/823616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kelkat9/pseuds/Kelkat9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rose survived traveling across the Void, found the Doctor and ended up back in Pete's World with a new Doctor.  Rose's trips across the Void were not without consequences.  The Doctor isn't the only one who needs to be made better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please heed the angst warning. Also, this is a different perspective on Jackie - maybe she and Rose butted heads on a few things. Also, maybe the Doctor does something that reminds her of a certain leather wearing Doctor when he stole her daughter away. I promise it has a happy ending.
> 
> * * *

 

_Once I knew only darkness and stillness... my life was without past or future... but a little word from the fingers of another fell into my hand that clutched at emptiness, and my heart leaped to the rapture of living_ — Helen Keller

Rose was walking to her office in Torchwood when she saw what she'd been expecting to happen. The Doctor was leaning against a wall having an intimate conversation with Dr. Livonia Marks. Anyone could see the way Livonia rested her hand on his arm and coquettishly laughed that they were flirting. Livonia was beautiful, blonde, intelligent and had a thirst for knowledge. She was just his type and Rose knew this. Most people would think this would cut Rose to the core considering all she had done to get back to him but it didn't. Rose was just waiting on him to leave her and it was killing her. She had never believed he would stay. It had been three weeks since Bad Wolf Bay and it was three weeks of Rose trying to grasp what had happened, of trying to process all that she did and survived in her dimension jumps and of the emotional and physical toll on her. She never complained and tried to do what she'd always done, tucked all the hurt deep inside and do what had to be done to survive to take care of others.

She'd travelled back to London with her mum and the Doctor, tried to keep everything light and easy, tried to comfort him and stay away from any painful subjects like the past or the TARDIS he had just lost. Her mum did most of the talking and kept the subject on Tony and her life. Of course, Jackie may have made a few comments about the Doctor getting a job and living a normal life like everyone else. The Doctor paled at these comments and Rose redirected the conversation asking for the Doctor's help at Torchwood dismantling the cannon and suggested he might want to look through the archives and storage facility.

Despite Jackie's insistence they spend some time at the Tyler mansion, Rose insisted on bringing the Doctor back to her flat. It wasn't much, but it was all that she had in Pete's world that was hers. She knew the minute he stepped into it that he hated it. He grew quiet and subdued as he stood in the small living room and stared at the sparsely decorated space. Rose felt even more horrible. Here was this Time Lord used to having a bigger on the inside time ship now forced to live on one planet, in one time in her tiny flat. It was like an affirmation of the thoughts pounding in her head. He had been forced into this and didn't want to be here much less be here with her. She wasn't the same Rose that travelled with him and he was seeing that now, seeing the truth. It would only be a matter of time before he left her. After all, why would he stay with her? What was left of her after the dimension cannon? She had put all that she was in the project only to be tossed aside, rejected and she believed there was a reason for that. Travelling across the dimensions, she'd been forced to do things, terrible things, things to save people, to stop tyrants and to do what she believed the Doctor would but she wasn't the Doctor and there were many days where everyone didn't live.

Perhaps the Doctor saw that in her, saw that darkness simmering inside of her. Maybe this Doctor here saw it too. He deserved better than her. She did her best to make sure he had everything he needed and tried to make sure he would have a fantastic life. Rose didn't want him to suffer any more than he already had. She tried to hide the nightmares that plagued her each night, muffling her cries and fear of the darkness closing in on her. Each day she put on a mask pretending everything was all right. He never asked any questions of her but she had caught him staring oddly at her a few times; especially, when he wanted to go adventuring and she begged off to file reports at Torchwood. It killed her a little bit each time he left without her but she was sure it was for the best. Torchwood was probably the only thing holding her together so she clung to every boring bureaucratic duty.

Now, staring at him with the beautiful Livonia, she was witness to what she was sure was the end of her and the Doctor. She swallowed hard when she saw him laugh and how Livonia cuddled up to him. Finally, she couldn't bear it and backed away and left the building. She went walking until she ended up at a chippy not far away and sat in a booth staring at her chips. After a few hours she slid out and went home. He wasn't there and why would he be? She convinced herself he was out on an adventure with Livonia and she was where she should be alone in a dark flat. That night the nightmares that had been plaguing her were horrific. The darkness was coming for her and she couldn't run from it. When she went to the kitchen the next morning the Doctor sat on the counter eating cereal and drinking his tea.

"So, you want to talk about it?" he asked as he spooned the latest Vitex product, Fruity-Os into his mouth, looking at her expectantly.

That's when Rose knew he heard her having nightmares that night. "I'm fine," Rose replied, pulling out a tea cup.

"Yeah, thought so," he answered in a clipped voice. "I've got things to do. See you at Torchwood," he answered and slammed out of the flat.

Rose flinched and burst into tears and sank to the floor. She hurt so much and for so many reasons and she couldn't find a way to make the hurt stop.

Later that day, everything came to a head. There was a report of a suspected alien spotted in an alley in London's south end. Rose, the Doctor and a Torchwood team were sent to investigate. It turned out to be true. Two humanoid aliens with lizard-like features were chasing and firing weapons at each other. The Doctor stepped in trying to get them to stop and they did. As the Doctor spoke to them, a door opened and a couple of children ran out startling the aliens. One of them fired at the Doctor. Rose responded instinctually and shoved him out of the way. She couldn't let him be hurt, he only had one life now and he deserved to live it and be happy. She felt an intense pain in her chest and fell to the hard dirty pavement. She remembered looking up and seeing the Doctor's angry face shouting at her and then everything went black.

Dwdwdwdwdwdwdw

The Doctor paced the hospital room, looking at Rose's unconscious form looking pale and fragile. She could have died that day, died saving him. He paused and looked out a window at a grey London sky. It was going to rain and that fit his mood perfectly. Everything had gone pear shaped since Bad Wolf Bay. Rose had been withdrawn, quiet, sad and almost lost inside of herself. He couldn't or didn't know how to rip her out of whatever was draining the life out of her. To him, that's what it seemed like, that everything that was his vivacious brilliant Rose was slowly ebbing away. It killed him to watch her slowly fade away like this.

None of this, being stranded on this Earth, had been easy. Oh, she'd tried to help make things easier for him. He could see that. She'd done everything she could to make things better, provide him with things to keep him occupied, introduced him to interesting people but it was meaningless without her at his side and she rarely was, at least mentally. That was the point she kept missing, that he needed her. What really confounded and disturbed him was that everyone around them seemed to ignore that something was wrong with Rose. Even Jackie just seemed to shrug it off and when he'd asked her, she had told him Rose was tired and just getting used to the idea of settling down. She'd seen Rose go through this when they arrived here and it was better to just give her time and not fuss. Jackie was of the opinion Rose would just get over it. Jackie thought it was high time Rose settled down and got her head out of the clouds and dealt with real life and real people.

The Doctor didn't agree. In fact, he thought Jackie was dead wrong. This was not Rose transitioning into a new earthbound life. This was Rose literally dying before them. What everyone else saw as Rose whinging at a card dealt to her or just needing to get over disappointment that she was back here, was not what he saw. Rose was certainly going through the motions and trying to placate them. She wasn't complaining or crying or asking for anything. She was just existing but not living. He couldn't stand by and watch that and he had done what came natural and run. He had run all over London, spent time with the people she'd shoved at him even if most of them were a bit boring. He'd put up with the annoying and overt attempts at seduction by Dr. Livonia Marks and several other human females. Not that they were unpleasant, but they weren't Rose. There had also been his own grief at the loss of his beloved TARDIS. While Rose writhed and fought off her own nightmares, he had lain awake in the night listening to the silence, interrupted only by Rose's whimpering and cries of terror from whatever nightmares haunted her.

Guilt assailed him for not going to her, comforting her from whatever was tormenting her. He had been dealing with his own grief and couldn't help her, or so he thought. It wasn't until he watched her shove him aside and take the energy pulse that should have killed him that he realized this was his one shot, a chance at a life with her that could be brilliant. Rose winced in the hospital bed. He watched her writhe as the machines connected her beeped and the tubes rustled as her body arched up from whatever nightmare was consuming her sleep. A nurse walked in and adjusted her medication causing her to relax. She smiled at him in a clinical, aloof way and walked out. It was all he could take so he did what he did best, he ran.

* * *

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.  



	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose survived traveling across the Void, found the Doctor and ended up back in Pete's World with a new Doctor. Rose's trips across the Void were not without consequences. The Doctor isn't the only one who needs to be made better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I mentioned in the last chapter, this is a different perspective on Jackie. I edited this quite a bit because I wanted Jackie's perspective to be clear. She believes what she's doing or saying is right and best for Rose.

 

 

Pain, that was Rose's first thought. She was in pain and everything was white which was almost a comfort compared to the darkness that haunted her nightmares. She tried to sit up but found her wrists bound to bed rails. She looked around blearily and saw Jackie sitting nearby. She looked up at Rose, put down her magazine and walked over to her.

"There you are," Jackie said softly, smiling down at her. "We were so worried, sweetheart. The doctors say you were so lucky that the blast just hit your shoulder. You could have died," Jackie told her, her voice catching.

"What?" Rose asked and tried to lift her hand but couldn't. She stared at the wrist straps.

"You was thrashing around something fierce so the nurses had to restrain you so you wouldn't pull the IV out. They'll let you up when we're sure you're not gonna have another episode," Jackie promised and swept some hair off of Rose's forehead looking worriedly at her daughter. The nurse had told Jackie that Rose was suffering night terrors which wasn't unusual after suffering a trauma like this. To Jackie, this was more evidence that Rose needed to be away from Torchwood. "Don't you worry 'bout a thing. When we get you outta here, I'll get you set up at home and you'll be right as rain before you know it."

"The Doctor?" Rose croaked out.

Jackie rolled her eyes. "Oh he's fine. Better than fine by the way he's runnin about. Not that he can be bothered to see me, mind you. The nerve of him! You're in the hospital after saving his life and he can't even be bothered to…"

Rose let her head fall back into the pillow. "He's run then. He's gone," Rose interrupted a faraway look in her eyes, her voice quiet and forlorn.

Jackie sighed, frustrated at all of this. First, for the alien git leaving Rose and breaking her daughter's heart and then at the alien git who stayed and accused Jackie of not looking after her own daughter. As if he knew what was best for Rose! Jackie had refused to indulge Rose's moody and downcast behaviour over things not going her way and that git of an alien suggested she was wrong. Jackie knew her daughter better than anyone and she would be damned if she would allow him to swan in and make things worse by giving into Rose's morose attitude.

In her mind, it was about time for Rose to grow up and learn to accept the life she had. Jackie had lost plenty in her life, including a husband, and she'd learned to appreciate what she had and felt it was about time for Rose to do the same. She was tired of having to watch her daughter constantly avoid the real world around her and focus on some impossible dream. She was convinced that tough love was the answer to make her daughter strong again. Jackie believed that Rose had everything here, wealthy parents, a brother, a good job, this new Doctor and anything she could want if she'd just embrace it. It killed Jackie to watch Rose pine for the Doctor after their first visit to Bad Wolf Bay. At the time, she'd indulged her and then watched her daughter dive into Torchwood and a dangerous life Jackie hated. It had been the source of more than one row between her and Pete and she'd always lost.

With the stars going out, she was helpless to stop Rose and in the end had to admit, if she had to trust anyone with the lives of her family and saving the universe, it was the Doctor and Rose. She had been ready to let Rose go forever but wanted to make sure the Doctor understood she was entrusting him with something precious so she'd gone after Rose to her home universe. It wasn't easy leaving her son behind but she had to see Rose safe.

Once back here with Rose and this new Doctor, it seemed like a gift and it annoyed her that Rose couldn't be happy. Jackie had watched Rose withdraw and decided she wasn't going to acknowledge it and frankly felt Rose was being ungrateful and unappreciative of what she had here and how lucky she was. She couldn't understand how Rose couldn't see it or why she continued to risk her life. Now, her daughter was in the hospital after saving the Doctor on yet another Torchwood mission and if Jackie had anything to say about it, this would be Rose' s last Torchwood mission. She didn't understand why Rose even needed to be there anymore. She had the Doctor now and that's why she'd started at Torchwood to begin with.

The Doctor was a whole different issue with her. Part of her blamed the Doctor for this latest injury and maybe even for Rose's poor attitude. He should have sat Rose down as soon as they'd returned to London and cleared the air. It was particularly annoying he wasn't being more helpful at the hospital. After Rose was hurt, all he did do was pace around making demands of doctors, glaring at people and being a general pain in the arse until finally she didn't see him anymore. She'd heard he only visited when she wasn't there and maybe that was just as well. She needed to focus on getting Rose out of the hospital and back to a normal life. Maybe it would be easier without him in it as constant reminder to the Doctor that left her here.

Jackie wasn't surprised that Rose's first question was about the Doctor. If there was one thing she knew, Rose loved him, even this him. It had been frustrating to watch Rose both pine for him and shove him away. And he had been just as bad, allowing Rose to act this way. As she watched her daughter laying down staring at the ceiling she sighed in frustration. After sitting by Rose's bedside, her nerves were frayed and she was just so angry that Rose put her life in danger and especially for the Doctor. The Tyler temper flared and Jackie just exploded.

"Rose, you've got to shake out of this and you have to get well. You can't spend the rest of your life feelin' sorry for yourself. You've got a family and a job and friends if you'd just accept it. Really Rose, the Doctor's gone and this new one is here mooning after you. And what about Pete, Tony and I? Three weeks you've been back and you haven't even come to supper once! You just mope around and work. The stars are back and everything's fine. Life goes on even if it isn't how you planned for it to happen. You got the Doctor and you don't need Torchwood any more. I just don't understand why you can't let it go. You have everything. Why can't you just be happy?"

Rose didn't answer. She felt a deep well of darkness pulling at her almost like a piece of the void had nestled deep within her slowly consuming all that Rose Tyler was into it. "He's gone," she said and tears pooled in eyes. "He'll be better off without me," was the last thing she whispered as the darkness claimed her.

dwdwdwdwdwdwdwdwdw

The next time Rose opened her eyes, she wasn't in the hospital. There were birds singing and a breeze carrying the scent of lavender gently blew against some gauzy white curtains filtering the sunlight. As she focused, she found she was lying on a giant bed in a room filled with old dark wood furniture. She reached up and rubbed her eyes and found medical band on her wrist, leftover from the hospital. She thought back and furrowed her brow trying to remember what happened. She remembered the alien shooting at the Doctor and she shoved him aside, she was shot and then she was in the hospital and her mum was there but then it went hazy.

"Good morning," a very familiar voice said. She looked up to see the Doctor walking toward her dressed in jeans and a Beatles t-shirt layered with a light blue dress shirt over it. He set the tea cups on a side table and fluffed pillows behind her so she could sit up.

Rose stared at him, memories from the hospital and her mum saying he wasn't there, that he'd run yet he was here now with her. She was confused.

"I don't understand," she said in a hoarse voice.

He handed her tea, Earl Grey and prepared the way she liked.

"I know and that's why we're here," he answered and reached over tucking some hair behind her ear. "Drink your tea." He leaned over next to her and picked up his own cup, sipping and smacking his lips together. "Nothing like a nice cup of tea, filled with free radicals and tannins. Good for the synapse," he said, tapping his temple and grinning at her.

Rose sipped and looked at him. "I was in the hospital. How did I get here and where is here by the way?"

He looked delighted with her question. "Brilliant question, Rose Tyler! You always ask the right questions! The answer is, I nicked you. Stole you right out of from under the proverbial noses of those primitive and idiot physicians!" he declared proudly. "Did I ever tell you I stole my TARDIS?"

Rose sipped her tea and shook her head curious to where this was leading.

He recounted the story of he and his granddaughter Susan sneaking into the proverbial TARDIS junkyard and stolen her away. Then he paused. "But, we are not here to talk about my thumbing my nose at dodgy politicians," he said, looking pleased at that memory. "Now where was I? Oh Yes! Where are we, as in physically not temporally or philosophically, which would be a whole different conversation!"

"Doctor?" she asked, trying to get his attention before the oncoming babble got away from both of them.

"We are in the back of beyond Scotland!" he explained enthusiastically.

"Okay," Rose answered, her hands warmed by the cup of tea. "But why? I mean what happened? Does anyone know…"

"No!" he answered sharply, "and they're not going to until we decide to tell them which is not yet. Not until, you're better." He finished softly and reached over to cup her face. "This time, this place it's for us. No more pushing away, no more pretending everything is fine, no more interfering mothers and no more wasted time. We both need this."

Tears welled in her eyes as she realized what he was trying to do and all the emotions she'd been trying to tamp down and tuck away began spilling out. "But, you don't have to do this. Why are you doing this? Don't you understand? You've only got one life now. You deserve better, that fantastic life you wanted for me but I couldn't…"

He set the tea cup aside and pulled her into his arms and just held her.

"You don't understand, I can't, Doctor. I'm not…I'm not that girl anymore. I'm broken and I don't know how to…" she barely got out between the tears and just dissolved into his arms as he held her and murmured soft lilting words in some language she didn't understand. She was lost and felt herself descending into that dark place, a place where she'd convinced herself she deserved to be because she wasn't good enough to be his or anyone's.

He pulled away and held her face in his hands. "Rose Tyler, that girl is still here and I'm looking at her. She may be lost and broken but she's tucked away inside of you and I still see her even if you can't."

"But you deserve better than some broken girl who can't find her way. You deserve to be happy and be loved by someone good, not someone who's been where I've been and seen what I've seen. You deserve someone smart and beautiful like Livonia Marks," she said in a shaken heartbroken voice.

"Livonia Marks?" he questioned with an distasteful look on his face. "The tarty doctor from Xenozoology? Oh Rose," he said and sighed. "The only one I need or want is you, broken or not. Everyone is broken at some time in their lives," he said to her and laid a gentle kiss on her forehead. "I know that better than most and I know how easy it is to lose your way and think there's no fixing it. After the Time War, I didn't think I deserved to live or to have anything good in my life and then I met you. You made me better, Rose. Just like other me said on the beach."

"But he said I had to make you better, this you, and I can't. I can't even fix myself and I can't bear the thought of hurting you because I'm so miserable and cocked up so badly there's no way out. It hurts so much and I just can't."

The Doctor looked at her as she fell apart. She truly believed she was lost, unredeemable and that she didn't deserve a chance for them to be them. He wondered what had happened to destroy her confidence and faith. "Rose, we can make each other better. That's what we do you and I."

He pulled back gently. "I need to understand, Rose" he said as he placed his fingers to her temple. "Please, let me help you."

She pulled back and scooted across the bed pulling a pillow in front of her protectively. "I don't want you to see," she said and stared down, not even wanting to look at him.

* * *

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.  



	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose survived traveling across the Void, found the Doctor and ended up back in Pete's World with a new Doctor. Rose's trips across the Void were not without consequences. The Doctor isn't the only one who needs to be made better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obviously if you are on chapt 3, you know this is angsty. This chapt. is dark. There is discussion of war and children being used as soldiers. It's not overly graphic, but Rose shoots someone. I just wanted to put that warning out there.
> 
> * * *

 

 

_She pulled back and scooted across the bed pulling a pillow in front of her protectively. "I don't want you to see," she said and stared down, not even wanting to look at him._

The Doctor could practically feel the pain and fear rolling off of her. He'd never seen Rose like this. It tugged at his inner Oncoming Storm in a way he hadn't felt in a long while. He wanted to vanquish whatever or whoever had done this to her but first he had to help her. His Rose was in pain and he was the Doctor. If anyone understood her pain, it was him.

"You think it's so terrible it will shock me?" he asked, snorting. "Rose, I'm over a thousand years old and I've done things so terrible you could not comprehend them. I doubt whatever this is will surprise me."

Rose looked up at him, "You said you were nine hundred and three."

"Oi, so I knocked a few years off here and there. It's not like your mum hasn't been forty three for a few years now from what I've heard!"

Rose relaxed and started to smile a bit. "Careful, there might be a smile there," he said softly, pleased to see her beginning to open up.

"No, there's not," she said, hiding behind her hair falling over her face and sniffing.

He crawled across the bed to her. "Oh yes there is. You can't hide it from me, Rose Tyler." He stretched out on the bed in front of her, gazing up at her tear streaked face and parted her hair to see her better.

Rose just looked down at him, amazed that he was here with her and trying so hard to make them work. Almost spontaneously, her hand found his, their fingers lacing together. "I stole you away Rose Tyler, just like my TARDIS so we could do this, learn how to be us and so we could both mend each other."

Rose looked into his eyes and nervously bit her lip, one hand holding the pillow to her and the other holding his hand. "I'm scared. I couldn't bear it if you hated me. I'd rather watch you walk away," she said softly.

"I'm not going anywhere unless you ask me to and I won't hate you no matter what you show me." He rolled his head to the side looking across the room for a moment and then turned back to her. "I've done far too much damage in my lifetime to hate anyone other than myself."

"I don't want you to hate yourself. You don't deserve that. You've done so much good, helped so many people, saved so many people," Rose said softly, letting the pillow she had been clinging to fall and beginning to relax as he squeezed her hand, his thumb caressing the back of her hand.

"And I don't want you to hate yourself," he repeated back to her.

She nodded finally and looked at him. "If we do this, just promise me, you won't…"

"I won't," he interrupted her and sat up on his knees before her. She took a deep shuddering breath and sat cross-legged before him. He swept her hair back and looked into her eyes.

"It's just me. No one else is here and no one knows where we are. No one is here to judge you. You can tell me or show me Rose, but you can't keep holding this inside."

She nodded and wiped her hands on her jim jam bottoms and looked up at him. "Will it hurt if I let you…you know do your mind thing?" she asked in a nervous but trusting voice.

He shook his head no. "Just relax and breathe."

He again placed his fingers on her temples as he had before but wasn't satisfied with that contact and leaned over gently pressing his forehead against hers. After Rose relaxed against him, he tentatively reached out to her mind only to find it strongly shielded. He was still Time Lord enough to easily tear through her psychic defences but knew that would damage her even further and he was concerned that her already frail mental state would shatter. "Rose," he said softly. "Try and relax. Let go."

"I can't," she answered, her voice shaking, and she projected a picture of something so dark and terrible, it made him pause. It was the Howling.

"You're not in the Void. You're safe here with me. I won't let anything harm you," he said and sent comforting thoughts to her, hoping she would sense them and let him in.

After a few more minutes, he felt some of the tension ebb from her and ever so slowly slipped into her mind. He expected a typical human mind albeit a bit more jumbled due to her extremely emotionally tumultuous state. What he found was darkness, long corridors of darkness with doors along the way. It was neat and tidy, and very unlike any other human mind he'd visited. Most humans were a jumble of memories and thoughts swirling around like ribbons in a vortex. Some were bigger than others and these would be current and emotionally powerful memories and thoughts. Others would be thin and barely scene. These were distance memories or autonomic functions. But, Rose's mind wasn't like that.

As he made his way down the darkened corridor, he could hear things through the doors. Behind one door were giggling whispering girls from Rose's childhood, behind another was Jackie and Rose rowing over Jimmy Stones, another was…well it was him. It was when he asked her the second time to travel with him in his Northern accented voice and now he could hear her unspoken thoughts, "Yes, yes, please take me with you. I want to see, I want to experience it all before it's too late and this boredom consumes me. I want to see the universe with you, please."

He paused and had to tamp down his own emotions and moved forward past more doors, listening to Jack's voice tell some bawdy story, her weeping after an adventure where everyone didn't live, a whispered conversation with his TARDIS that left him reeling and which he planned on addressing with her later. There was also a door through which he could hear the conversation on Bad Wolf Bay where she declared her love to him. Behind other doors, there was Pete's voice arguing with her or laughing with her and one that was another row with Jackie this time. There was one with her playing with her brother Tony and one with another argument, this time with Mickey and then things changed.

He could feel her anxiety increasing as he ventured deeper into her mind. He sent her more calming thoughts and made his way into the inky blackness almost feeling cold seep into his mind from hers. He was getting closer to whatever was traumatizing her. His body shivered in response to whatever lay deep in her mind. The doors were distorted and thick. Some bulged outward and were chained shut.

He moved closer to one and visualized laying his hands against it. It felt like his body was encapsulated with ice and ripped apart at the same time. There was intense pressure and the most frightening noise he'd ever heard. He moved away from the door and realized it was the Void. This is what she had traversed each time she had ventured out looking for him. It made him sick. "Rose," he thought into her mind and heard his own voice echo back. The only other sound was her whimpering somewhere in the thick darkness of this place. He had to find her and resolve this.

There were more doors and he explored each as much as he dared. Visions of barren and desolate landscapes, packs of prehistoric type creatures with eyes narrowed at Rose, running, pain from being stabbed, shot at or falling and more running. She seemed to always be falling down an embankment, into water or through the nothingness of the Void. Throughout it all, she was alone. He wondered why she was always alone and why Torchwood didn't send anyone with her.

Rose's voice answered. "It was too dangerous to send two at first. The dimension cannon was unstable and it was rough crossing the void. It was safer for one and I was the only one that knew when we hit the right universe."

"What about Mickey? Why wasn't he doing the same?" the Doctor asked, trying to remain calm at the thought of her being repeatedly shot across the Void alone.

"He was runnin' the tech and after we found the right universe, he did make a few trips. Besides, him and me weren't exactly seein' eye to eye," she answered, conveying regret and sadness at this.

The Doctor felt a simmering anger at this, that Rose's life had been risked so many times and she'd suffered so many injuries and yet still she had been sent through the Void alone. It took all of his Time Lord training to remain focused and not allow his own emotions to interfere with his task. There were still more doors and he moved onward although it was becoming difficult. He felt like he was doing the equivalent of swimming through a strong current that kept dragging him backwards away from his goal. He was determined to find out what was so horrible that she had buried it so deep.

That's when he saw the doors that were oozing a thick black substance that was pooling around the base and further on he saw doors coated in blood. Again, he paused to control his own emotions and not cause her further distress. One of the black coated doors opened before him. It was a memory of an Earth filled with Daleks using humans as slave labour but these were not normal humans. They had been modified and were some sort of hybridized work force, part Dalek, part human. It was a living nightmare and they had caught Rose. She was being dragged toward an industrial looking building and held down while they… The door slammed shut and he lost his control. The Oncoming Storm was just below the surface and his anger at the torment they inflicted on her, probing her mind, inflicting pain to try and worm their way into memories and find out more about her and how she fought back and wouldn't reveal anything. Daleks, it always came back to them. He wanted to storm into that room and lay waste to them all. That is, until he heard her crying and then he remembered. He had to save her and this was nothing but a memory, a memory she had just relived no thanks to him.

He calmed himself. His mind whispered to her, "Rose, it's just a memory. It can't hurt you. I won't let it." Eventually, he felt her calming but there was still underlying fear, horror, regret and guilt ahead. He moved on. He could feel a difference in her now. She was more battle worn and closed off. She didn't just run, she fought. A London dominated by a warlord soon found hope as Rose helped organize rebels. There were other places where she'd been hurt saving a child caught in the middle of a brutal and vicious land dispute or she was mistaken for an outlaw and almost executed. It wasn't all bad. Sometimes there were memories of her stopping for chips or people watching or even visiting a Henriks not blown up by him.

He finally started to get to the heart of the matter when he found himself entering a part of her mind that was devoid of all sound. Here, he found one of the blood soaked doors. "No," her mind cried out. "Please, No!" she wept.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Rose, but I have to. I promise to be quick and try and buffer you from this as much as I can.

"I don't want to remember," she whispered softly and tearfully.

He tried to comfort her as he touched the door with his mind and it creaked open. It was a war zone and Rose was caught in the middle of a battle. Explosions rocked the ground around her, dust and dirt rained down and bodies were everywhere. She'd tripped and fallen on a pile of corpses. They were young, too young to be in a war. A bullet impacted the ground near her and she grabbed a gun off one of the bodies. It was the first time she'd picked up a gun. She was shaking and knew she had to jump out of here but she had to wait for the jumper to charge. She crawled through mud and things she didn't' want to think about to find a protected spot to wait. She curled up there while the battle raged around her. The ground shook, huge booming noises filled the air mixed with people crying out. A group of soldiers was charging up toward her and one saw her and aimed his weapon. Rose panicked and drew her weapon and fired. The solider was a teenager, a mere boy in Rose's eyes. She was horrified. They were all just kids she soon realized. Someone was sending children to fight a war. She had dropped the weapon and looked at her hands unable to comprehend that she had ended someone's life. Her jumper bleeped that it was charged just as more soldiers came at her with weapons armed. She jumped.

The Doctor was then thrown out of the memory and the door slammed shut. He understood now and probably was one of the few people on Pete's World, if not the only person, who could empathize with what she was feeling. This wasn't just her crossing the Void to find him. This was Rose fighting a battle, sometimes physical, sometimes mental but always emotional. His Rose had been so brave, fought so hard, tried to do the right thing but doing the right thing was not an easy task. In fact, it was a heavy burden and one that he would make sure she never bore alone again. It reminded him of himself and confirmed how much they needed each other.

There was still another dark door ahead but as he approached, something else caught his attention. It was another door opposite from it with golden light seeping through the edges. "No," he mentally whispered. She couldn't remember Bad Wolf. That door had to stay locked. He spent some time shoring it up before turning to the final door in this dark part of her mind.

It opened easily for him but he could feel Rose flinch. Inside was the world where he never met Donna Noble, the world where he died. He felt her almost inconsolable sadness as an image of his body being rolled away appeared before him. There were more images: his body on an autopsy table and Rose along with Jack Harkness stealing his remains and the two of them taking him to a remote location to cremate him. This was the dark world where Rose had donned the armour that now weighed her down, locked away the girl who once existed and where she had become a version of him. He watched as she followed Donna, saving her time after time; as she sacrificed Jack, teams from UNIT and watched so many of his friends die. It wasn't her fault but she saw it that way. When Donna had to sacrifice her life, he could feel the anguish and guilt unfurl and begin strangling her.

The only thing that had kept her going was her faith in him, in finding him, in saving everyone. Then, Bad Wolf Bay happened and it all came crashing down. Darkness enveloped him as he felt it pulling at her mind and spirit. It wasn't just memories and guilt in here, a bit of the void stuff had collected and leached onto her mind as well. He was confident, he could rid her of it and could see it was amplifying the feelings of fear, guilt and loss that afflicted her. Healing the emotional scarring, the memories of what she'd endured, that would take time.

He pulled out of her mind and looked at her tear covered face. He knew she was suffering but he could see a glimmer of something in her eyes. It was hope. He pulled her into his arms and she fell apart. She hadn't told Torchwood everything. Pete didn't know the details. She'd kept it all inside of herself all of this time but not anymore. He held her while she wept for everyone she'd lost, for every death she'd witnessed or been responsible for. She wept for other him and the hardships she knew were in his future, for the timelines she'd seen and those she knew would suffer. He held her until she was spent and he laid her back down. He felt his own tears trailing down his face and reached up and touched them. They both had suffered and they both were letting go now. In helping her see that she needed to share her burdens, he realized he needed share his as well. He looked at her lying exhausted on the bed and knew there would be many more days ahead for them to talk. He was ready to do that now. First, he had to see to her, to help Rose regain her confidence and strength which he knew was still within her. It was the one thing holding her together all this time. He squeezed her hand and slid across the bed to go make more tea but she gripped his hand and begged him not to leave her alone. He slid over to her and pulled her in her arms, holding her until she fell into the first peaceful sleep she had known in months.

* * *

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.  



	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose survived traveling across the Void, found the Doctor and ended up back in Pete's World with a new Doctor. Rose's trips across the Void were not without consequences. The Doctor isn't the only one who needs to be made better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT this chapter. This is one of those chapters I spent a great deal of time editing. Transitioning from powerful angst to healing and smut is tricky. I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> * * *

 

 

After the Doctor's emotional trip though Rose's memories, they spent days just holding hands, walking in the country and enjoying a fairly quiet time for them. The Doctor would babble on about everything from the cool misty weather, the geology of the area to the burrowing habits of badgers. Rose was quiet and took it all in. Slowly, she began to open up and speak about her time at Torchwood. She revealed more about her dimension jumps, the good and the bad as well as her life here in Pete's world. The Doctor also revealed some of his time with Martha and Donna as well. It was tentative and still painful for both of them but it was also healing. Of course, this time was also filled with some lighter moments such as the time they were chased by a bull that took offense to the Doctor testing his sonic. There had been a great deal of running and climbing over a fence, falling down on the other side and breaking out into hysterical laughter over comparisons of this adventure to those they once enjoyed. It was the first time that the two of them had really let go and laughed together.

As the days passed, Rose had good moments and bad moments and so did the Doctor but they were there for each other. Sometimes they would vent, shout, row and storm off but they always reconciled and held onto each other at the end of the day. Nightmares came and went for both of them and soon they lessened. Rose still had days where she wanted to hide away but the Doctor never let her, insisting on taking her on adventures in the country as a distraction. Likewise, the Doctor had nights where he stared at the stars longingly and Rose would cuddle up to his side and grasp his hand and whisper, "Better with two" as she smiled up at him. He would wrap her in his arms and sigh thankful to have her even if it meant being planet bound for a few years. He would tell her about the TARDIS coral he was growing and point to the stars and talk about what planets orbited them and what they may find out there in this new universe.

Rose eventually learned he wasn't kidding when he said he'd stolen her. He revealed the whole caper. He had arrived at the hospital in the middle of the night and waited in the stairewell with his accomplices, a dozen dogs, cats and, oddly, a couple of geese. When the nursing staff was reduced for the quiet night shift, he released his animal co-conspirators to race down the halls in typical rambunctious and noisy fashion. While the nurses were off rounding up cats, dogs and geese, he unhooked the medical devices attached to Rose and carried her out, secreting her away down the back stairs and tucking her in a car and driving away. Rose had just stared at him astounded and then grinned. It was so him.

As much as she enjoyed the quiet time away in seclusion with the Doctor, she knew she couldn't hide forever. People would be worried. The Doctor didn't seem to care. He was angry that no one had taken the time to make sure she was well and would have let her fester in her own guilt and despair and he felt no need to contact her family. Rose elected to send an email to Pete's private account assuring both he and her mum she was fine and the Doctor was taking good care of her. In fact, she told them that with the Doctor's help, she was better than she'd been in a long time. She also resigned from Torchwood but told Pete if he had an emergency, she and the Doctor would be available.

Pete had responded in short order, at first angry that it had taken this long for either her or the Doctor to contact him. He made clear that he and Jackie had been worried and Jackie was, in fact, livid with the Doctor and demanded to see Rose immediately. Rose had sighed and rubbed her head. She wasn't ready to deal with that yet. After staring at the screen for a long time, she slowly typed out a heartfelt message to him, confessing how much she had not told him about her dimension jumps. It was emotional and she walked away from the laptop more than once before she finished her email to him. She confessed enough to help him understand what was weighing her down, why she needed this time with the Doctor to figure out how to live this life here given all that she had done and how she wasn't ready to contend with her mum yet. Pete seemed to understand but made her promise to email often.

Thus, Rose and the Doctor relaxed into a domestic life. Well, domestic for them, which may have included him working on growing a new TARDIS in the basement of the cottage he had rented under the name of James McCrimmon. Unbeknownst to Rose, the Doctor had sold some tech he invented to one of Pete's subsidiary companies. He'd been a bit chuffed at his cleverness and ability to provide for them without either of them working or Torchwood.

Rose wasn't idle. She needed to be busy so she worked at the local library part time. The village they lived near was small and quaint. The people were kind and didn't ask many questions. It wasn't as exciting as Torchwood but it was what Rose needed and she genuinely enjoyed getting to know the people and bringing books home to the Doctor. It was almost a game. She would bring home a book and he would tell her how it was different in their universe or tell her some story involving the history of the book or author and what part he played in it. Rose often suspected he was making most of it up even though he swore it was the truth.

They took things a day at a time. Everything became their adventure from growing the TARDIS to growing peas and carrots in the garden. There were also other domestics like cleaning, laundry and cooking. They often bickered over whose turn it was to do what but it was generally friendly. Except, of course, that time the Doctor shredded all her knickers. Rose may have wondered if he really was sorry about that. In fact, she decided to test he theory one night. Neither of them had been quite ready to dive into an intimate relationship although they had skirted the issues a few times. Rose thought perhaps it was time and he was just waiting for her to make the first move. If shredding knickers was his subtle hint, Rose was going to rise to the occasion and find out how much it would take to seduce a Time Lord.

He had been out running errands, visiting people in town which translated to being the village handyman and tinkerer. He may have made Widow Stanton's oven a bit more sonic or fixed old Mr. Henley's antennae to pick up a bit more than Earth programming. No one ever questioned it though. People here just shrugged their shoulders and accepted the eccentric Dr. McCrimmon.

Rose was waiting for him when he arrived home one evening. The table was set for tea when he bounded in the door and tossed his coat aside. "Rose! You'll never guess what happened to Mrs. Dalton's nephew at…." he said cheerfully as he walked in the house and then stuttered to a stop when he saw Rose in nothing but a black bra, knickers and an apron, standing provocatively by the table. She grinned that flirtatious smile. "So Doctor, see anything you like? I mean we have hot buns, a couple of delicious melons and luscious marmalade sausage balls," she said sexily as she sidled up to him.

"He looked at her standing before him running her hands up his chest and unknotting his tie. "Mar…mmmmalade?" he stuttered and swallowed hard and then smirked as he felt her slide his tie off. "Why Rose Tyler, are you trying to seduce me?" he asked in a deep voice.

"Mmmm, maybe," she answered. "Is it working?"

"Oh yes!" he answered enthusiastically and tugged her closer, slowly leaning down, nuzzling his nose against hers before softly pressing his lips against hers. They had snogged before but always stopping before things became too heated. Both desired each other and the sexual tension between them had been building. It was evident in everything from long heated glances when he walked out of the shower with only a towel wrapped around his hips and Rose watching rivulets of water cascading down his chest; or Rose slowly eating a strawberry, bite by delicious bite, strawberry juice glistening on her lips as he stared and licked his own lips as if tasting her. Now, with Rose barely dressed and wrapped up in his arms enjoying his wonderful soft lips pressed against hers, things shifted. As Rose moaned and allowed her hands to untuck his shirt, he sucked her bottom lip into his mouth tasting everything Rose. She sighed and soon their tongues were, sliding and caressing each other. Her foot drew up his calf making it clear what she wanted as his hands drifted down to her bum.

Rose ground against him making a pleased noise when she felt his arousal poking her in the abdomen. She made short work of unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it off of him. He ripped the apron off of her and gazed appreciatively at the lacy black undergarments she wore. He licked his lips and pulled her against him hard. He wanted her, badly. It had been difficult waiting but he wanted her to be ready, to really want him, this him.

They fumbled their way into the bedroom and tugged off his trainers and the rest of their clothes and fell backwards on the bed. He paused panting, leaning over her breasts. "Rose, are you sure?" he asked in a strained voice.

Rose looked into his dark eyes so filled with passion and love and nodded. "I love you and I want this with you," she answered assuredly.

He groaned and crawled up her body, his mouth crashing onto hers while her hands glided down her sides and lower until his fingers tangled into her curls. Her body arched up and her legs parted as she tried for the friction she so desperately wanted. As he swirled his fingers through her folds teasing her until she gasped "Doctor" he trailed kisses across her jawline until he reached her neck where he began nipping and sucking.

Rose wrapped one of her legs around him drawing her foot up and down his leg enjoying the feel of his hair against her smooth calf and imagining the feel of his gorgeously spiked hair ticking her thighs as he gave in to his oral fixation. She ran her fingers through his hair, her nails scraping his scalp eliciting a moan from him just as she always fantasized. He plunged a finger into her warm wetness and she let out a gasp of her own. It had been so long since she'd had anything like that and even then, it was nothing like the fire he was stirring in her. Oh the fantasies she'd had about him. Her fingers tightened in his hair as a second finger was added and he started swirling and exploring until he found a particular spot that had her legs convulsively tightened around him and he made a satisfied noise as he nipped at her earlobe. "How long you gonna stay with me?" he asked in a passion roughed voice.

"Forever!" Rose cried out, breathing hard as her orgasm subsided.

He shifted to position himself between her splayed legs planting his hands on either side of her shoulders and gazed into her eyes. "Rose," he said in a gruff voice. "No more lonely nights, no more suffering alone. This is our forever."

Tears were in her eyes and she nodded. This was them banishing the nightmares. He'd seen into her mind and he'd showed her glimpses into his own life. He'd shown her the darkness that littered his past, choices he's made that he regretted and the pain of losing her. It had helped her to come to terms with her own guilt and mistakes and brought them closer together than they ever were before. It was time for them to come together physically just as they had telepathically. He laid his forehead against hers as he plunged into her.

Rose gasped as one of her hands tightened in his hair and the other raked his back. Her legs tightened around him with her heels digging into his delicious bum. He began moving inside of her, his hands gripping the bedding on either side of her has he tried to maintain some type of control. Each thrust of him inside of her, feeling his skin slap against hers made her gasp. He felt so good, so right and she encouraged him onward to let go.

He grunted and felt an ecstatic pressure building, a delicious heat pooled deep inside of him and all he wanted to do was crawl into Rose and never leave. He felt his skin slick with the exertion of each movement and soon his mind was delving into hers and they were telepathically wrapping around each other. He groaned her name as he felt each delicious bite of her nails digging into his back and his scalp and each dig of her heels made him thrust harder. As he took in all these sensations, memorizing each flutter of her muscles, scent of her flesh and sweet sound she made, his movements became more hurried and frantic.

The Doctor began saying her name and _love you_ over and over again as she whimpered and mewled _yes_ beneath him. This was them coming together they way both always wanted, wild and passionately with no restraints. He thrust into her as she angled her hips up to meeting him and he hit her just right and Rose screamed, she clenched around him and her mind exploded in golden light which pulsed into his own mind and triggered his own orgasm and he shouted out her name. He collapsed on top of her and rolled over taking her with him so she was lying bonelessly on his chest breathing hard.

He closed his eyes and basked in the afterglow, the feeling of having Rose in every way he had fantasized about and this life, this forever he could have with her. There was no doubt in his mind he would jealously hoard every minute of time with her. His arms closed around her as if to notify the universe she was his and no one would take her from him. For Rose's part, she wasn't complaining. She snuggled into his chest and murmured sleepily how much she loved him. There were no nightmares that night and the two of them basked in each other, with no thoughts of anything beyond each other.

* * *

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.  
  
This story archived at <http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?sid=50544>


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose survived traveling across the Void, found the Doctor and ended up back in Pete's World with a new Doctor. Rose's trips across the Void were not without consequences. The Doctor isn't the only one who needs to be made better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter. This is really about Jackie and Rose. To me, Jackie can be a little to protective and has a difficult time accepting Roses choices and seeing Rose as an adult. This chapter explores how she resolves herself to this and how Rose has to learn to talk to her mother about it. Poor Doctor bears the wrath of Jackie Tyler. It all resolves well I think. Thanks for reading and all the lovely reviews!

 

 

Tucked away in their cottage away from Torchwood and with just each other, it was a happy time for Rose and the Doctor. Rose had mostly recovered and was more herself. Although her experiences crossing the Void and working for Torchwood had changed her forever, she was still able to find peace and happiness. The Doctor had also found his own spot of happiness as well. Nothing was perfect and it never would be and the past would always be a part of who they are but now they had each other to hold their hand, to assure and to love. That was enough for them.

The only slight hurdle to Rose's recovery was that she had left friends and family behind in London and trying to make them understand she needed this break was a challenge. The Doctor had no issue leaving people behind and Rose was well aware of this, but she couldn't do that. She had tentatively contacted the few friends she had at Torchwood by email and eventually they seemed to understand. Her mother, however, was another story.

Rose had continued to email Pete and Jackie. Pete seemed to be content with this provided Rose promised to return to London for visits. Rose could tell that Pete was bearing the brunt of her mother's irritation with Rose and the Doctor. Jackie was furious with the Doctor and that anger was also being directed at Rose now. Jackie accused the Doctor of doing the same thing he had done when he wore a leather coat, stealing her daughter away and keeping her from Jackie, her friends and family. Jackie made Rose feel guilty for missing family events and not spending time with Tony but Rose couldn't regret this time with the Doctor.

Thinking perhaps a more personal conversation might calm down her mum, Rose rang her one day to try and explain to her how much she needed this time to work through things but Jackie insisted she could bloody well work through whatever back in London. Jackie also insisted that the Doctor was controlling Rose and Rose needed to take some time away and come back to London alone. Rose had ended the call with, "Mum, I'm happy. We just need this time. I promise, we'll be back for the holidays but I need this time with him where it's just us, no Torchwood, no Vitex, just Rose Tyler and the Doctor." Jackie had sighed and said she didn't agree but would wait _for a while_.

Jackie Tyler's definition of _for a while_ and Rose's were two entirely different matters. In fact, Rose didn't realize how upset her mum was and the extent to which she would go to secure her daughter. The last time the Doctor stole her away, Jackie was helpless to do anything. This time, however, she was the wife of one of the wealthiest men on Earth and she had resources.

It all went pear shaped for Rose on a sunny but crisp day. Rose was in the kitchen, barefoot, dressed in jeans and one of the Doctor's t-shirts, her hair in braids. Rose had never been much of a cook but part of her recovery from what she had suffered from the dimension jumps was to experiment and try new domestic things. She'd painted, sketched, gardened, worked on the TARDIS with the Doctor, written some short stories, tried out photography and learned to cook. She was getting quite good at cooking and had made some decent meals that the Doctor seemed to enjoy. Her latest project was cake. She was determined to bake chocolate cake. The Doctor had peeked in on her a few times and she'd pushed him out and promised that if he came in trying to steal a taste, he'd be wearing it.

When the door to the kitchen opened Rose was ready to teach him a lesson and pulled the batter covered spoon out and tossed batter at him. Unfortunately, it wasn't the Doctor, it was Jackie that was covered in chocolate cake batter and she was not happy.

"What the bloody 'ell are you doin?" Jackie shouted, looking down at her now cake batter covered white blouse and jacket.

"Mum! What are you doin' here?" Rose asked, shocked and quickly putting the spoon down and grabbing a dish towel to clean it off of her. Jackie yanked it out of her hand and glared at her.

"I've come to rescue you from that controlling git who's brainwashed you. I mean look at you Rose!" Jackie exclaimed, staring at her daughter's bare feet and make up free face.

"What?" Rose asked and pulled on the too long Doctor t-shirt she wore which was now smudged with chocolate.

"You're a mess that's what and it's high time for you to come home. Really Rose, he kidnapped you from the hospital! You could have died and then he locks you away hundreds of miles from your family. Does he even tell us you're all right, NO!" Jackie said, working up a good head of Tyler anger. "Weeks go by and then what do I get, an email sent to Pete! Do you even care about Pete and me and what we went through or what about Tony? How am I supposed to answer when he asks where his sister is?"

"Mum, calm down," Rose pleaded. She knew Jackie would be upset and she was ready to let her vent on her. "I'm sorry we didn't call sooner but we needed time alone. I was in a poor way and the Doctor was helping me."

"Helping you!" Jackie shouted. "What was he helping you with? You were shot and needed to be in a hospital not locked away in some dingy cottage kept away from real doctors and your family!"

"You don't understand," Rose tried to reason. "I needed 'im, Mum. I wasn't just shot. I was in a real dark place mentally."

Jackie would have none of it. "Is that what he's convinced you? He's manipulatin' you and it's gonna stop now! I don't know why I expected this one to be so different! It's just like when he had that box of his and stole you away and filled your head with all that alien stuff, so much so that you wasted years of your life here obsessin' over 'im!"

Now Rose was starting to lose her temper. Her mum had softened toward the Doctor after he regenerated but there was still a deep seeded resentment. It had come up more than once, especially when Rose had left her Mum in Pete's World to help the Doctor at Canary Wharf. Jackie never forgot that or how it had hurt her. The two of them had tried to move on and especially with Jackie remarrying this Pete and then with Tony's birth. Rose had tried to make up to Jackie even though in her heart, she still wanted to be with the Doctor.

Jackie hadn't liked Rose working for Torchwood but she'd dealt with it as long as Rose showed up for family dinners and babysat Tony whenever Jackie asked. When the dimension cannon started working, Rose knew Jackie had bit her tongue and not said what she felt. She'd tried to see things from Rose's perspective and was ready to let her daughter go. Since they returned, however, Rose felt pressured by Jackie to embrace a normal life. The problem was, Rose was suffering from what she'd scene and done and couldn't just settle down to some domestic life Jackie envisioned. Her mum had ignored this and kept acting like everything was fine and making demands on Rose to settle down. At the time, Rose was so miserable she couldn't see what Jackie was doing. Her mind was much clearer now and she knew it was time to set some boundaries and to make her mum understand that Rose loved her but she had to make her own life and that life was with the Doctor, this Doctor.

Before Rose could set things straight with her mum the Doctor walked in.

"What's going on? Jackie, what are you doing here? Why is there a police car out front? Rose, are you all right?" He looked from Jackie to Rose, an unhappy expression on his face.

"I'll tell you what's going on Mr. Lord of All Time and Space, kidnapper of hospitalized girls," Jackie started and poked him in the chest. "This is over and I'm takin' Rose back away from you and whatever alien stuff you've done to her!"

"What?" Rose asked just as a couple of policeman walked and started pulling the Doctor away.

"No!" Rose shouted and went following them while Jackie grabbed her arm.

"Let them take him, Rose. He kidnapped you right there in the hospital and we have video of 'im doin' it. This time, he's not gettin' away with it."

Rose turned to her mum. "Have you lost it?" she shouted and pulled away and ran after the Doctor, trying to tell the police that her mum was barmy and the Doctor did not kidnap her. Unfortunately, Jackie followed and soon there was a mother and daughter shouting match while the Doctor was locked in the back of the police car fuming. Eventually, the officers pulled Jackie and Rose apart and declared this would be settled at the police station.

Rose was livid. "Fine, just let me get my purse and keys and I'll follow you. She looked at the Doctor and walked over to the window placing her palm on it. "I love you and don't worry. We'll get this sorted. He placed his palm on the opposite side of the window and mouthed _I love you too_.

"Sweetheart, if you would just listen to me," Jackie started.

"No! I've done enough of that. Now I've got to go bail the Doctor out no thanks to you. You can find your own way there."

And with that angry comment hanging in the air between them, Rose stormed off leaving Jackie standing in the driveway with her hands on her hips, angry and upset with her daughter and also a bit worried.

At the police station, the Doctor was put in a cell which he paced and practically singed the bars with his glares. It was very telling that none of the constables wanted to go near him. Something about him set them on edge. Rose showed up after Jackie and was on her mobile. When she rang off she demanded to know who was in charge.

She was led to the office of an officer who was already talking to Jackie. He stood up. "Ms. Tyler, I'm Chief Constable Harry Stewart," he said and held out his hand.

Rose shook it. "Good, I'd like a word with you alone, Chief Constable."

"Rose, there's no need for this," Jackie pleaded now, much calmer. "You have to see things from my point of view. He took off with you with no word! For all I knew you were dead!" she reiterated.

Rose turned to her and stared hard in her mother's eyes. "No, Mum. That's not what this is about. This is about me bein' sick and the Doctor takin' care of me. This is about me bein' so ripped up from all that travelin' I did to find him and all the horrible things I had to do and see to find him. He made me better. You're the one that needs to respect that I'm an adult and make my own choices. Yeah, the Doctor should have told you I was okay and once I was in a good mental place, I did email Pete and then called you. That should have been enough. We planned on going back to London to see you, Pete and Tony and take care of some stuff but now I'm not sure what we'll do."

She turned to the Chief Constable. "Can we talk now?" He nodded and escorted her out to another room, leaving Jackie twisting her purse strap and picking up her mobile.

Rose quickly sorted things out with Chief Stewart who was very understanding of family disputes. All charges were dropped. Pete also arrived, having gotten word of what Jackie had done and followed Jackie shortly after she'd left. When Rose finally emerged from her meeting with Chief Stewart, Pete was glaring at Jackie. When he saw Rose, his face softened.

"Hi, Pete," Rose said softly.

"Rose, are you all right? I've made some calls to straighten out this mess."

"I know," Rose replied and walked over and hugged him.

"Look, I'm sorry things came to this," Rose said and glanced at her mum who looked miserable. "I'm sorry both of you worried but I'm not sorry the Doctor brought me here. You both need to understand how badly I needed it. I needed time away and someone to talk to about what happened."

"I know you didn't tell us everything and I wish you would have," Pete said, a knowing look in his eyes. He understood emotional trauma after losing his first Jackie and having to contend with the horrific aftermath of the Cybermen.

"It was just too hard and I was trying to concentrate on finding the Doctor and then when we got back, I was so worried about this Doctor. Some of it was just too terrible that I couldn't bare it so I just kept it all inside and focused on everyone else. I tried to make everyone else happy, but it was killing me. The Doctor saw that and he understood."

"I would have helped you," Pete said and sighed.

"I couldn't," Rose responded. "And after we got back, it weighed me down and I just felt like I was disappearin' and everyone was better off without me."

"Rose, I..I'm sorry. I thought you was just mornin' the other one and didn't say anything. I should have. I'm your mum and I didn't…" Jackie said, finally understanding what Rose had been suffering through.

Rose sighed. She couldn't stay angry at her mum and knew it was better to put this behind all of them so they could be a family. If she didn't take this first step, the Doctor never would. She walked over and hugged her mum. "What happened to me, it's not your fault, Mum. It just happened but that doesn't mean you can go all avenging mum on the Doctor. I mean, I understand your worry and all but, you have to trust us, trust me. I don't expect you to understand everythin' but I do expect you to respect me and my choices. I love 'im, Mum and that's not goin' away. My life is with 'im just like your life is with Pete."

For the first time ever, Jackie looked at her daughter and really saw her as an adult. She had seen her as Rose Tyler, Doctor's companion, defender of the Earth, Torchwood Agent, sister and daughter but never just Rose, the capable, independent woman. Tears ran down Jackie's face as she realized this and she realized that Rose did look healthier than she had in a long while. She wrapped Rose up in her arms and repeated she was sorry and how one day Rose would be a mum and understand how difficult it can be watching your child run head first into danger and wanting to protect her, even from herself.

Eventually, Rose sat and chatted with Pete and Jackie about what she and the Doctor had been doing. Pete was a bit tickled that the Doctor had sold him one of the more profitable inventions for one of his company. "It's always good to keep it in the family," he had teased Rose.

Soon the Doctor was walking in and looking thunderous. Rose jumped up and tugged him aside. After a long snog, some loud whispers, him scuffling his feet, one pointed glare at Jackie, Rose grabbing him by his tie and saying a loud "I love you, you nutter" and another snog, they walked over to Jackie and Pete.

Rose looked at her mother expectantly. Pete had already stood up to shake the Doctor's hand and apologize for how everything had snowballed into this.

"Mum," Rose said and looked at her.

Jackie fidgeted and looked back at Rose. She clearly did not want to address the Doctor.

"None of us are goin' anywhere until you apologize to the Doctor," Rose announced and crossed her arms, the stubborn Tyler woman look on her face.

Jackie sighed and stood up. "Fine, I'm sorry," she said, not exactly looking at him or sounding the least bit contrite.

"Mum," Rose said in an annoyed tone.

"Look, I'm sorry I got you arrested. I was just looking out for my daughter," she finally admitted, glaring a bit at the Doctor.

"And you thought it necessary to burst into our home, upset Rose and have me arrested?" the Doctor responded in a clipped voice, his eyes still dark with anger.

"If that's what it took, yes!" Jackie responded harshly.

"Jacks," Pete said and glared at her.

Jackie sighed, now emotionally worn out from having to admit she had pushed the limits on her crusade to keep Rose safe. "Oh, all right, I'm sorry, Doctor and I really am. I didn't realize Rose was in such a bad way and I should have. I was trying to do what I thought was best. I didn't know it was something other than her gettin' all out of sorts because things didn't work out like she thought they would. Maybe I should have and that's my fault. You did see it though, and you took care of her and for that I'm grateful. I'm happy she had someone who loves her and she can love. I don't pretend to understand this life you two lead but I'm glad you're happy. I can't say I won't always want to protect her but I promise next time, I'll talk to her first before things get out of hand."

The Doctor nodded his head. For him, this was a start. He knew she was a fiercely protective mother and he respected that. He just wanted her to respect what he and Rose had together. It was tense but when Rose wrapped her arm through his, he felt some of the oncoming storm ebb away. That night, Rose hosted a peacekeeper dinner. She and Jackie cooked while he and Pete talked about Torchwood, Vitex and some ideas the Doctor had that he was considering designing for Pete. Dinner itself was a little tense with Jackie being herself, accusing Rose and the Doctor of not eating enough, complaining about the shape of their home and offering up that she and Pete could buy them a home and maybe if they were married it might make a nice wedding gift. The Doctor who had been snipping back at her was speechless at that last comment. Rose jumped in and told her Mum if the Doctor and she decided to do that, she would be the first know and thank you very much for all her kind offers but if they wanted to buy a house, they'd do it on their own, together. No mention was made of the growing TARDIS in the basement. Both the Doctor and Rose decided they'd leave that for another time.

It was the first of several family dinners. It would take time for this family to heal and learn to trust but they would get there. Pete and Jackie left that night even though Rose had offered up the guest bedroom much to the Doctor's horror. Pete seemed to understand they needed time to be them and declined saying it had been a busy day and he was sure they needed time to themselves. After more goodbyes, they finally left. That night, Rose snuggled up to the Doctor who seemed a little too quiet.

"Doctor, are you all right. I mean, honestly all right?" she asked with concern.

He turned and looked at her and laced his hand with hers. "When you were in the hospital, they told me I had no rights to look after you, that I wasn't family."

Rose squeezed his hand and shifted closer to him. "But you are my family. I'm closer to you then anyone."

He looked at her for a long time, his thumb casually caressing her hand. "Not to them and not to Jackie. Those doctors and bureaucrats didn't respect me or what I wanted for you. They only listened to Jackie and all because she met some legal definition. Didn't matter that I was better versed on your injury or had knowledge to speed up your recovery."

Rose's brow furrowed as she thought about this. "I could have Pete draw up something so it doesn't happen again, so you'd be the first person they talk to."

He quirked a smile at her and leaned over to kiss her forehead. "You're missing the point. I don't want anyone to ever question what we are to each other."

Rose was stunned as she realized what he was suggesting. "At tea you looked horrified when mum suggested…"

He winced and rolled on his back and stared at the ceiling. "Yes, well, this is different. I mean, it's not like, you know Jackie getting all mothery and making some big production." He rolled over on his side and looked at her, a soft look in his eyes. "This is about us, you and me and no one else. If anything happens to me, I don't want Torchwood controlling things, I want you and if anything happens to you, I don't want Jackie Tyler barrelling in trying to sweep you away from me."

Rose smiled at him. "Funny way you have of askin' me to marry you," she teased.

He winced. "Don't call it that! I don't need some bureaucratic Earth paper to tell me what you mean to me. I just don't want to ever have to…"

"Steal me away in the middle of the night?" Rose teased.

He grinned. "We could just do it in town. No one has to know but us. Unless, something happens and then we can whip it out and stop a certain blonde terrorist from attempting to overthrow our happiness."

"She'll find out," Rose teased. "And you know she won't be happy, may even force us into a party."

He snorted. "We'll deal with it then. Right now, this is us."

"Forever," Rose said and curled up to him.

"Forever," he agreed and wrapped her in his arms.

* * *

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.  



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